New Year’s Eve 2020

It’s 5:45 a.m. on New Year’s Eve Day and I can’t help but think about new years resolutions this morning. I’m beginning to think I’m not a big fan of them. To me they have become something that doesn’t last. No one expects you to actually stick to new year resolutions. I’m the same way. I usually say I’m going to start going to the gym, eat better, quit smoking, quit something or start something and by march or sooner it’s over.

I’d like to think I’m becoming a person that wants more meaning in my life. I want to be on purpose. So my new years resolution is just that. To be on purpose!

I’m going to try to find meaning in everything I do. Or at least come to the conclusion that I’m doing something simply because I enjoy it.

I feel like I’ve spent most of my life flying by the seat of my pants. Living one moment to the next without any real meaning or purpose and I think that’s one of the reasons why when I look back I have a hard time remembering meaningful moments. Not to mention tons of alcohol! When I got out of rehab in 2016 and decided to stay in Memphis to figure myself out I remember that. I remember it because It had a huge meaning and purpose and was easily one of the hardest decisions I had ever made. I spent 2 years questioning everything I had ever known. I also began building this new relationship with God that for so many years I refused to embrace because I couldn’t understand it. I remember more of those 2 years then I do of the 10 plus years before that.

I want to get back to there.

Psalms 143:8 KJV

Cause me to hear thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in the do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto thee.

Of course I made a video to go with this Blog!

Hope you like it.

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